Thursday, April 27, 2017

April 2017

Saturday, April 29th, 11:30 pm: Night Moves, ImprovBoston, Cambridge
Sunday, April 30th, 9 pm: StandUp ThrowDown, ImprovBoston, Cambridge

Monday, April 17th, 7 pm: Comedy & Crepes, Burlington VT
Sunday, April 16th, 8 pm: Boston Comedy Chicks, Slumbrew Brewery, Somerville
Saturday, April 15th, 9 pm: The Mendoza Line, Boston
Thursday, April 13th, 8 pm: Stand Up JamImprovBoston, Cambridge

Sunday, February 26, 2017

March/April Shows

This is really just for me at this point.

c/o @hamburgerphone

Thursday, March 2nd, 8 pm: Staunch, Allston
Saturday, March 11th, 8 pm: ComedyKaze, Somerville; 9 pm: Battle Royal, ImprovBoston, Cambridge
Sunday, March 12th, 9 pm: People's Show, ImprovBoston, Cambridge
Wednesday, March 15th, 8 pm: Limelight Comedy, Boston
Thursday, March 16th, 8 pm: The Comedy Studio, Cambridge

Sunday, April 2nd, 8 pm: The Comedy Studio, Cambridge
Thursday, April 13th, 8 pm: Stand Up Jam, ImprovBoston, Cambridge
Saturday, April 15th, 9 pm: The Mendoza Line, Boston
Monday, April 17th, 7 pm: Comedy & Crapes, Burlington VT

And on Friday, March 31st, come down to the Arts at the Armory in Somerville for Laugh While You Can's benefit show to raise money for The Welcome Project!

Thursday, January 12, 2017

January/February Shows

"IS ANYBODY THERE? DOES ANYBODY CARE?" - Girl from my high school doing performance art in our talent show.

Also me because I don't think anyone reads these posts, even though people are always asking, "When's your next show?"


Saturday, January 21st, 8 pm: Comedy at Gallery 263, Cambridge
Monday, January 30th, 8 pm: Double Midnight Comics, Manchester, NH
Wednesday, February 1st, 8 pm: The Comedy Studio, Cambridge
Saturday, February 11th, 8 pm: Laughing Liberally, Arts at the Armory, Somerville
Thursday, February 16th, 8 pm: The Comedy Studio, Cambridge
Saturday, February 18th, 9pm: Mendoza Line, Boston
Sunday, February 19th, 9 pm: The People's Show, ImprovBoston, Cambridge
Thursday, February 23rd, sometime: Thunderbar, Allston
Friday, February 24th, 8 pm: The Hideout, Faneuil Hall
Saturday, February 25th, 7 pm: The Bad Bad Show!, Wonderbar, Allston
Tuesday, February 28th, 9 pm: Hot QUEso, Sunset Tap, Allston

Tuesday, January 3, 2017

Winter Shows

It's getting darker and colder and more bitter. I'm of course talking about my heart. But it's also wintertime.

Here are some places I'll be over the next couple months.

December 9, 8:30 pm: Comedy at The Green Room, Cambridge
December 15, 7:30 pm: Comedy in Bubby's Basement*, Mamaleh's, Cambridge
                            9:00 pm: Stand Up Break In, Riot Theater, Jamaica Plain
December 21, 9:30pm: ImprovBoston Holiday Stand-Up Showcase
December 29, probably around like 8 or something: Thunderbar Comedy
January 1, 9:30 pm: ImprovBoston 100 First Jokes, Cambridge
January 3, 8:00 pm: McGreevy's, Boston
January 4, 8:00 pm: Limelight Comedy Club, Theater District
January 5, 9:00 pm: Storytelling at The Riot Theater, Jamaica Plain
January 11, 8:00 pm: Bull Feeney's, Portland, ME
January 30, 8:00 pm: Midnight Comics, Manchester, NH

***January 13, 7 pm: Laugh While You Can's first benefit show to raise money for RAINN. Come support this important cause!

And/or donate here.

Check back for updates.

Wednesday, December 7, 2016

Favorite Albums 2016

2016 was the worst, right? Mostly everything blew ass out of pieces of water*. Except for the music. The music was pretty good.

In no particular order, here are my favorite and/or most listened to albums of 2016:
  1. Julien Baker - Sprained Ankle
  2. Radiohead - A Moon Shaped Pool
  3. Kanye West - Life Of Pablo 
  4. Beyonce - Lemonade
  5. Kendrick Lamar - Untitled
  6. Big Thief - Masterpiece
  7. Rihanna - ANTI
  8. Solange - A Seat at the Table
  9. Angel Olsen - MY WOMAN
  10. Chance the Rapper - Coloring Book

No one ever cares about these posts, but they're important to me, so I keep making them.

*This is an expression I made up in 2002 while watching the movie Signs.

Monday, October 10, 2016

Fall Shows (Updated)

I don't trust anyone who doesn't like candy corn. It's sugar and honey, you fucks. What's not to like?  Anyway, happy fall, guys. It's time to watch things DIE.

Here are some places I'll be over the next couple months:

October 5th, 8 pm: Limelight Comedy, Boston
October 11th, 8 pm: Unscene Comedy, Iron Furnace, Quincy
October 23rd, 8 pm: The Comedy Studio, Cambridge
November 5th, 8 pm: Sweet Caroline's, Fenway
November 15th, 8 pm: McGreevy's, Boston
November 20th, 9 pm: People's Show, ImprovBoston, Cambridge
November 26th, 7 pm: Boston Comedy Project, ImprovBoston, Cambridge

Check back for updates.

Wednesday, August 31, 2016

September Shows

Remember when I blogged? I was all like, "You guys, I boiled down my weekend into 10 bullet points just like Buzzfeed would want! I'm a writer! I swear! I can prove it. I spent $60,000 on an English degree and everything. What is Wordpress?"

Something like that.

Once a week, I look at myself in the mirror and think, "Maybe I should start blogging again." Then, I squeeze all of my blackheads until my face looks rug-burned and I forget why I went into the bathroom in the first place.

Instead of blogging, I've devoted all my ~free~ time to writing down joke ideas in my Notes app. Well thought out premises, like this one:

Displaying IMG_2743.jpg

People* have asked, so here are some places you can find me in September:

Wednesday, September ​7th: 8 pm, Boston Comedy Arts Festival, ImprovBoston, Cambridge.

Saturday, September 10th: 8 pm, Boston Comedy Chicks, Doyle's Cafe, Jamaica Plain.

​Thursday, September ​15th: 9 pm, Stand Up Break In,​ The​ Riot Theater, Jamaica Plain.

​Saturday, September ​24th: 9 pm, Battle Royale, ImprovBoston, Cambridge.

Check back for updates.

*My mom and dad.

Saturday, January 23, 2016

Drunk GOT

If Drunk History ever decides to do a Game of Thrones spinoff, I hope they'll call me.

Tuesday, December 15, 2015

Albums of 2015

It's that time of year when I tell you about music I like as if you care. I become more and more noncommittal as I get older, so I'm not going to say these are the best albums of 2015, or the only ones I thought were good, but they are the ones that, for better or worse, I listened to the most.

Drake: If You're Reading This It's Too Late

Sufjan Stevens: Carrie & Lowell

The Weeknd: Beauty Behind The Madness

Laura Stevenson: Cocksure

 The Internet: Ego Death

All Dogs: Kicking Every Day

Joey Bada$$: B$.DA.$$

 Marian Hill: Sway

 Kendrick Lamar: To Pimp A Butterfly

Okay, I lied a little bit. I am VERY committed to Lady Lamb. My favorite album of the year is, without a doubt, After:

Wednesday, October 28, 2015

Things I learned this weekend: Chicago Edition

I had to get up real early for my flight on Saturday, which was especially difficult since I had slept for roughly 14 minutes the night before. I woke up at 2 in the morning to Boo attempting to break down our front door, and didn't fall back to sleep for hours. I don't know what he was trying to achieve, but he was definitely successful at annoying the shit out of me.

So cute though.

Needless to say, I was up in time for my flight. Good thing, too, since Google calendar was of no help to me this weekend. My flights had been automatically added to my calendar, but of course, they were in Eastern Standard Time. So, since booking my flight, I thought that I would be arriving in Chicago at 10 am (I arrived at 9), and that I would leave at 7 pm (I left at 6). This is because there are these things called time zones, and apparently Chicago is far enough away to be in a different one. Who knew? Luckily, I made it there and back without a problem.

Shortly after I arrived, I went out to brunch with my friends/hosts where I ordered breakfast nachos. Technically, they were called chilaquiles, but I'm white, so I'm appropriating them for you. Did you know that there is a bounty of delicious Mexican food in Chicago? That's the second thing I learned this weekend. The first being time zones.  Surprisingly, I did not any eat any deep dish pizza nor hot dogs while I was there. But I did drink a ton of delicious beer, and that's what's important.

On Saturday night, my friend and I went to see a show at Second City. It was hilarious and edgy, but it wasn't actually improv, as I had hoped.  Now that I'm, like, a professional improviser (read: I pay hundreds of dollars to take classes on how to LARP in front of an audience), I want to see improv everywhere.  Regardless, the show was very well done and actually professional.

On Sunday night, I went to WGCI's Big Jam, which featured a number of artists including Meek Mill, Kendrick Lamar, and Monica - as in, The Boy is Mine, Monica. Truthfully, I didn't know she still existed, but she put on a great performance. I was going to riot if she didn't sing "Angel of Mine", so thankfully she did.

Speaking of almost rioting, WGCI DJs kept telling the crowd to tweet at them for a chance to see their tweets on the jumbo-tron. It is an absolute travesty that this was one was not chosen:

For those of you who don't know, Yazz is a rapper (and also a type of birth control).  And that tweet is a lie. I was just being modest.

Anyway, I was pretty surprised that so many people cared about Meek Mill and more surprised that so few people stayed to see Kendrick Lamar. Then again, I was also no less than a decade older than everyone around me, so maybe I don't know what's cool anymore. Related: I sat down for most of the show.

After such a big night out, I took it easy the next day, exploring Chicago on my own. I spent most of the day at the Art Institute of Chicago, which is impressive since I don't really care about art. Here's a selection of my favorite pieces:

I call this one "Playa, please."

I call this one, "Beetlejuice".

I call this one "One Night Stand" because it looks like the guy has quietly gathered up his clothing and is surreptitiously trying to ghost before she wakes up.

I call this one, "Stephen Hawking".  

This one is legitimately called "Woman", which gives me the sense that Miro was probably not a feminist. 

This one would make a perfect welcome mat.

I spent the rest of my time eating donuts and wandering around different parts of the city. I guess I looked pretty comfortable because three people came up to me on the street to ask me for directions. It made me realize that, next time someone does that to me in Boston, I can just lie and say, "I'm not from around here," and they'll leave me alone. #NewEnglandHospitality

Til next time, Chicago!